I Cornered Myself In

I cornered myself in. Making sure every single piece of independence and self sufficiency I once had stockpiled was given up up and away. I was so efficient and effective with my handouts that I now sit in this tight, breathless space lonely claustrophobic and unsure. Certain of only a few things... certain the floor will be ripped from under me at any given point, certain i'm fucked when that happens, certain my heart is going to shatter into a million razor sharp pieces, dripping with heartache and loss and weariness when I hit the floor in a heavy thump. Sharing myself... my thoughts and dreams and hopes and needs... Ignoring my uncertainties and stripping my delicate heart completely bare for the meddling and muddying hands of others might have been the biggest mistake I have ever made.

~Anonymous